MY FIRST TIME TO WATCH A MOVIE

If asked what was the first movie they ever saw, most people would answer something of the family fare type.  Your lolos and lolas would say The Wizard of Oz or The Sound of Music.  Your parents may say ET or The Lion King.  Today’s kids’ first movie will most probably be from Pixar (in 3D or IMAX).

My first movie is horror.  Not just a scary movie but a gruesome, gory horror movie.  It’s called Zuma.  Zuma is a tall, green, muscular bald monster with a two-headed snake resting on his shoulders that eats the hearts of virgin women.  I saw it with my mom, my younger brother (also his first) and a tita in the no longer existing Aliw Theater Nova.  I remember refusing to go inside the dark theatre, playing a tug-of-war with my mom.  Once seated, I managed to keep my eyes open to look at then what I thought was the biggest TV screen I’ve seen in my young life. I say “managed” because there were a couple of times that I’ll bury my face in my hands or on my mom’s arm everytime a scary scene was on.

But now my brother thinks that what we actually saw was not Zuma but its sequel Galema: Ang Anak ni Zuma.  Galema is a beautiful woman with snakes for hair much like Medusa or Valentina.  She is at odds with Zuma because unlike her dear old dad killing is not her thing.  I think we first saw this film on free TV.  Brother said he saw it again on cable.

I hope to see both films again.  Whatever is the real first movie we saw, we both agree that Zuma was a part of our childhood.  We’ll definitely be at arms if there are ever plans of reviving the Zuma character.

If you’re asking what’s the next movie we saw the answer is Mga Kuwento ni Lola Basyang starring Chichay in the title role.  I don’t know if watching Zuma damaged our young psyche in anyway but if it did I think Lola Basyang repaired it somehow.

MY FIRST TIME TO WATCH A MOVIE

If asked what was the first movie they ever saw, most people would answer something of the family fare type.  Your lolos and lolas would say The Wizard of Oz or The Sound of Music.  Your parents may say ET or The Lion King.  Today’s kids’ first movie will most probably be from Pixar (in 3D or IMAX).

My first movie is horror.  Not just a scary movie but a gruesome, gory horror movie.  It’s called Zuma.  Zuma is a tall, green, muscular bald monster with a two-headed snake resting on his shoulders that eats the hearts of virgin women.  I saw it with my mom, my younger brother (also his first) and a tita in the no longer existing Aliw Theater Nova.  I remember refusing to go inside the dark theatre, playing a tug-of-war with my mom.  Once seated, I managed to keep my eyes open to look at then what I thought was the biggest TV screen I’ve seen in my young life. I say “managed” because there were a couple of times that I’ll bury my face in my hands or on my mom’s arm everytime a scary scene was on.

But now my brother thinks that what we actually saw was not Zuma but its sequel Galema: Ang Anak ni Zuma.  Galema is a beautiful woman with snakes for hair much like Medusa or Valentina.  She is at odds with Zuma because unlike her dear old dad killing is not her thing.  I think we first saw this film on free TV.  Brother said he saw it again on cable.

I hope to see both films again.  Whatever is the real first movie we saw, we both agree that Zuma was a part of our childhood.  We’ll definitely be at arms if there are ever plans of reviving the Zuma character.

If you’re asking what’s the next movie we saw the answer is Mga Kuwento ni Lola Basyang starring Chichay in the title role.  I don’t know if watching Zuma damaged our young psyche in anyway but if it did I think Lola Basyang repaired it somehow.

THERE’S MORE TO ENTERTAINMENT THAN TSISMIS

Here’s what’s keeping the tsismis reporters busy these days.  The “Who-Texted-Who-First Brouhaha” starring Shaina and Ruffa.  The “Missing 5 Million Peso Bank Account Scandal” with Raymart and Claudine.  Andi and The Baby Daddy.  The KC-Piolo split.  The Revilla Siblings Murder Mystery.  The Killing of Charice’s Father with Hurtful Banter and Tweets Exchange.

None of which are of any help to the movie industry.  The first four are just laundryshop gossip and are of no importance to people with at least half a brain.  The last two are major news because it involved crime, but still has nothing to do with improving the Filipino people’s taste in their entertainment choices.

It’s a pity that the mainstream entertainment media is focusing too much on crime and tsismis.  How about giving some time and space to more important stuff that will help raise the bar of local entertainment and elevate the people’s taste in watching movies?  Like the Cinema One Originals AND Cinemalaya.

These are festivals of movies minus the formulas.  The stars are not as big as the usual faces that you see sing and dance like retarded zombies on the Sunday noontime shows but the stories promise to be of more substance than a Star Cinema movie.

But that is not what the people want?  Then teach them to want it.  Think of Steve Jobs.  He just happened to create something that people never thought they would want or need.  You know, the iPad?

TWEEN COMEDIES

Here are plots of some of the hit TV shows in the US made for the teen/tween audience.  A teenage girl living a double-life as a popstar.  Teen siblings from a wizard family.  Two teenage girls starring in a hit Internet show.  If you have cable, you know that I’m talking about Hannah Montana, Wizards of Waverly Place and iCarly.   

               

Now let’s look at what Pinoy TV has for the teen/tween viewers.  All three networks are running what the Star (ugh!) Awards annual calls the “youth-oriented” programs.  There is Growing Up on 2, Tween Hearts on 7 and Bagets on 5. All three claim to “tackle issues concerning today’s youth”.  Yah, right.  Like it isn’t pretty obvious that they were just made to build the next big loveteam.  It’s been like that since the 80s and the 90s with shows like Gimik and TGIS.  Sus, it’s been like that since Guy and Pip, Vi and Bot, and Roger and Carmen (ask your lola)!

I think the “loveteam” will always be a part of Pinoy entertainment just as much as Indian movies will always have a musical number in every movie.  But sometimes I wonder if the networks could at least try to give the young viewers something else than the usual “kilig” that those loveteam shows has to offer.  What about comedy?

               

                Barbie Forteza, GMA’s reigning tween queen, would do great in something like what Selena Gomez did in Waverly and Miranda Cosgrove in iCarly.  I think she’s a natural in comedy.  The network is now trying her in heavy drama in the new soap Ikaw Lang Ang Mamahalin.  But I would rather see the 14-year old throwing funny lines than crying every afternoon.

THE LITTLE FILM THAT COULD

It’s official.  Ang Babae sa Septic Tank, a satirical look at Filipino independent moviemaking, is the Philippines’ official entry to the 84^th Academy Awards Best Foreign Film Language competition.  But that’s just phase one.  Come January, the official nominations will be announced and with Septic Tank’s excellent showing in various international filmfests, the movie’s chances look really good.

I do hope Septic Tank make the actual nominations.  I could just imagine Eugene Domingo walking down the red carpet on her way to the Kodak Theatre.  That’s something that the likes of Nora Aunor, Vilma Santos and Sharon Cuneta never did in their entire careers even with those “star” monickers attached to their names.

And if the film made it to the Oscars, I hope this will inspire the big moneyed film outfits to create movies that can compete in international filmfests and the Oscars.  Not some old crap about philandering husbands and mistresses.

SOME AWARD

Laughable.  That’s what I call the results of the third installment of the Star Awards for Music.  Was there any Filipino song, singer or album that really made waves in the past year?

But don’t forget that these awards are handed out by the PMPC, a group of showbiz writers who also sidelines as managers and publicists to the “artistas”.  So mainly these awards, just like the Star Awards for Movies and Star Awards for TV, is held just to promote their pets and their favorites.  Tell me, do you know any song from Gerald Santos’ album?  Does anybody even know or care who Gerald Santos is?  Then how come he won Male Pop Artist of the Year?  He even tied with Piolo Pascual for his Decades 2 album, another “singer”/album no music fan care about.  I’m talking about the real music fan here, not the screaming ASAP fan.

Jake Vargas and Ceasr Montano, award winning singers?  Willie Revillame winning in the novelty category?  Novelty?  Why did nobody told me we’re back in 2004?  Sarah Geronimo is Female Recording Artist of the Year.  Was anybody really aware that she got another album out? I’m aware of Angeline Quinto because I watched Star Power where she won and I also know her song Patuloy Ang Pangarap.  But is that the only huge song to come out this past year that’s why it became Song of the Year?  As tradition of the Star Awards, they also handed out inane awards namely the Star of the Night and Celebrity of the Night trophies.  No Mom of the Night award was given.

Any trophy that is given by the PMPC has no real value.  Nobody will say he or she saw this film or bought this album because it won a Star Award.  Anybody heard an “artista” billed as a Star Award winning actor? Whatever.  As long as these showbiz writers will be happy this coming Christmas

KC CONCEPCION: SITCOM STAR?

Poor KC Concepcion.  Just recently, the tabloid BALITA asked why Sharon Cuneta’s daughter was not as popular now that she is a TV/movie star as compared when she was just the non-showbiz daughter of the Megastar?

                Do they find KC “too elite” unlike Angel, Kim, Marian or Sarah who are “pang-masa” (a term I believe is derogatory both to the “artistas” and the people who call themselves that word.

                Currently, she’s a TV host.  She did a few movies but they were not exactly blockbuster ones.  Her teleseryes didn’t also connect that much to TV audiences.  So I guess the next route is:  the SITCOM.

                Not an everynight “comedy-serye” but a once-a-week thing.

                But this won’t be the usual Pinoy sitcom.  There won’t be 15 people in the show.  There will be no basketball or fiesta or secret treasure or haunted houses or mad scientist episodes.  And there is no “laglagan”.  The sitcom should be story-based for a change.

                So what will the sitcom be about?  How about KC playing a spoiled rich kid who moved out to live in a condo and work in Makati?  Let’s have her experience things she’ll never get to do in her old life and meet new people who are way different from those she are used to.  A love interest, sure.  But the first season should focus on her new life.  The love angle will be worked on the next season but the focus will still be on comedy.

                The timeslot.  With the current set-up of the three networks (weeknight teleseryes and a variety show for TV5), the only available time for a sitcom are weekends.  But the last few sitcoms never got a proper audience at those times (Andres de Saya, My Darling Aswang, Show Me the Manny, Malay Mo Madebelop).

                The perfect timeslot for KC’s new sitcom should be at 9pm anywhere between Monday to Thursday.  And because ABS-CBN, GMA and TV5 may have no time for the KC show then maybe another channel can accommodate it.  How about Studio 23 or one of those Solar owned channels like ETC or 2^nd Avenue?

                So, are the “masa” (God, I hate that word) going to watch it?  Probably not.  Unless a great marketing campaign is done.  The chismis writers always insist for “artistas” and the local TV shows and movies should reach for downwards the “masa”.  But isn’t it time for the “masa” to reach up? Well, that’s why I started this blog in the first place.  That maybe in my own little way I can help Pinoy entertainment to level up.

                But back to KC.  Situational comedy is her next best route.  If it’s written well by smart, witty writers and if it’s properly marketed then maybe there’s a shot to put not only KC’s career but the Filipino sitcom and the whole Filipino entertainment to a higher level.  If not, maybe KC should try politics or something?